Ok, I had planned to provide daily Winter Olympic commentary, but I’ve fallen a little behind – a lot behind. In fact, I sort of stopped watching the Sochi Games – well I tune in here and there and have lately wondered when it will all end. Will the Games last the entire Winter which would take us to March 19th? They are the Winter Games after all. But they’ve run out of events or at least I thought so until I tuned in this morning and saw snowboard parallel slalom. Wow! Kind of neat actually. It’s parallel in the sense that 2 snowboarders zigzag down parallel (in different lanes) weaving in and out of flags trying to “carve” clean and fast lines to best the other rider. And they are riders in a sense. You ride, not race a snowboard, right? Anyway, it’s all a little silly really, but fun to watch and it’s over in a flash – it’s like the the twitter version of blogging. Speaking of boards, what if the snowboarders skied on surfboards. I’d like to see surfboards on the half-pipe. Imagine if you slipped up at a restaurant and ordered oysters on the half-pipe. But what I actually want to write about are patterns – patterns to the medals. So if you haven’t been watching the Olympics and just want to know which countries are doing well in what and want to know how los Americanos are doing by comparison, this service is for you.
Let me preface the results reported below by saying that this might be a spoiler alert, or might not be. I’m not sure what you know or have or have not seen or what has been aired or what has yet to be aired tonight. All I know is that the Games are nearly done. Maybe some exhibition stuff, a Hockey match or two and perhaps a parade of champions or whatever they do left to go. You know what I think would be neat is for the athletes to compete in sports they don’t do for the last few days. Bobsledders do Luge. Lugers do Skeleton. Sliders do Bobsled and so on (are Bobsledders sliders or just bobbers?) Figures skaters could do Freestyle Skiing; Snowboarders the Giant Slalom (on their snowboards if they like). Freestylers could do Ski Jumping. Hockey players could try the Half-Pipe on skates, Curling or Figure Skating. Short-Trackers could do Speed Skating and so on.
Final Spoiler Alert……What I find interesting is how some countries dominate in certain events. The Dutch completely dominated the world in Speed Skating. Norway showed us all how to do the Biathlon, Cross Country and Nordic Combined. Canada, with it’s tradition of Monarchs showed it reigns supreme in Curling and Hockey, it appears. The Canadians also showed us how to Free Style with style. The Chinese simply shredded up the Short-Track. The host Russians danced their way to glory in the opening ceremony and on the figure skating ice, much to the delight of Vladimir Putin, no doubt. Actually, Putin could be nicknamed Poutin over the Russians poor performance in Hockey. The Americans had the upper hand or perhaps lower leg with respect to Snowboarding events. The Germans Lugers slid down the track with speed and precision and literally jumped off the charts on the hills of Sochi, normal and long along with Poland. So, here are the medal results for each event by country of dominance compared to the USA for all you competitive American readers out there.
Figures Skating – Russia. 5 medals, 3 Gold. USA – 2 medals, 1 Gold
Alpine Skiing – Austria 7 medals, 2 Gold. USA 5 medals, 2 Gold
Snowboarding – USA 5 medals, 3 Gold. Russia 4 medals, 2 Gold
Freestyle Skiing – Canada 9 medals, 4 Gold. USA 7 medals, 3 Gold
Hockey – Canada 1 medal,1 Gold. USA 1 medal, 0 Gold
Cross-Country – Norway 11 medals, 5 Gold. USA 0
Nordic Combined – Norway 4 medals, 2 Gold. USA 0
Biathlon – Norway 6 medals, 3 Gold. USA 0
Ski Jumping – Germany and Poland 2 medals, 2 Gold (each). USA 0
Bobsled – USA 3 medals, 1 Gold. Canada and Russia 1 medal, 1 Gold (each)
Luge – Germany 5 medals, 4 Gold. USA 1 medal, 0 Gold
Skeleton – Russia 2 medals, 1 Gold. USA 2 medals, 0 Gold
Curling – Canada 2 medals, 2 Gold. USA 0
Short Track – China 6 medals, 2 Gold. Russia 5 medals 3 Gold. USA 1 medal, 0 Gold
Speed Skating – Holland 21 medals, 6 Gold. USA 0
Filed under: humor, Olympics, Sochi Winter Olympics, Sports | Tagged: Alpine Skiing, Canada, China, dominant countries in the winter Olympics, Germany, humor, humour, Norway, parallel slalom, Poland, Russia, skating, skiing, Snowboarding, Sports, USA, Winter Sochi Olympic Results | Leave a comment »