100 Foods To Die For (or not) Before You Die (81-100)

Tom Thumb

I took The Food List Challenge and scored 61% having tried 61 of the 100 foods (or drinks) listed. So I’m going through each one, 20 at a time. Here’s the last of 5 installments.

Raw Oysters.  I didn’t like them much growing up in Arkansas.  I’d have eaten them fried, though, without much fuss along with some fried okra and cornbread.  But now that I live on the coast, where the supply is fresh and plentiful, I eat theses delicate sea pearls on the half shell from time to time.

Root Beer Float.  Oh, sure.  I’ve always had a thirst for root beer, don’t know why.  No one else in my family can stand the stuff.  And the float business just elevates it to heavenly status.  I am not a root beer snob.  I’ll drink any brand.  I don’t seek out the small batch micro brewed variety made with cane sugar from a rare sassafras plant found only in the Appalachian Mountains.

S’mores.  A chocolate marshmallow graham cracker sandwich, for those of you who don’t know.  And I can’t imagine too many of you don’t.   But if you don’t, or don’t know or remember how to make one, here’s all you do. Get you a box of Graham crackers.  No, Ritz won’t do.  Place a chocolate square on a graham cracker.  Toast a marshmallow.  Be careful not to set your house on fire.  Place toasted marshmallow on the chocolate.  Add a graham cracker on top of the marshmallow to complete the sandwich.  Press down.  The marshmallow will explode and the goo will melt the chocolate.  You can’t use just any chocolate.  It has to be to the cheap and cloyingly sweet American Hershey milk chocolate bar.  Hipsters, do not use designer, organic, non GMO, pesticide free, fairly traded, 85% dark cocoa infused with chipotle sourced from the Costa Rican rainforest.  I mean, you could, but it wouldn’t be a S’more.  Do it right and it’ll do you right.

Sauerkraut.  I love the stuff especially on a chili dog with mustard.  And in my opinion, sauerkraut is the key to the Reuben sandwich.

Sea Urchin.  No.  The truth is, I’m a little scared of it.

Snail.  If I were a kid and told I had a plate of snails in front of me, I would say, “YUCK!” As an adult, I would respond the same way.  I never have and never will eat snail unless in a survival situation.  Go ahead, say it.  I lack culture.  Fine, I’ll accept that.  Don’t say I don’t know what I’m missing.  I do know – a slimy slug.

Snake.  Snake stew.  Snake soup.  Snake casserole. Snake on the barbie.  Snake on a stick. Snake dog. Snakewurst. Snake and onions.  Snake and Shake.  Nope.  In a survival situation, maybe if it doesn’t kill me first.

Soft Shell Crab.  As I’ve posted before, I’m not a huge fan of the crustacean in general.  I’d rather eat chicken.  But I’ve had crab meat before, and it’s just ok, nothing special.  I prefer it as dip, to be honest, with Fritos.

Som Tam.  Don’t know this one at all.

Spaetzle.  Don’t know this one either.  Sounds German.  Maybe something pretzel like. I truly don’t know what I’m missing.

Spam.  I could write an entire blog post on it.  Let’s just say that I ate Spam on occasion as a young man.  It was easy. Just rip off the lid and presto – instant pork protein…and salt, water, sugar, sodium nitrite and potato starch.  No need to cook, although I sometimes heated it up.  Spam smells a little funky which is probably the main reason I stopped eating it some years ago.

Squirrel.  I know people who squirrel hunt.  I’ve been squirrel hunting a few times myself for sport, but I’m not a good shot.  I’ve never eaten squirrel.

Steak Tartare.  I like my steak rare, but not raw.

Sweet Potato Fries.  I don’t even like sweet potatoes unless they are covered in hot marshmallow cream. I have had beet and truffle parm fries at Grass Fed that in my opinion are infinitely preferable.

Sweetbreads.  Yes.  Portuguese and Irish.  And Honeybuns from vending machines and decadent cinnamon rolls in cafes and those mall joints. Wait, these aren’t sweetbreads?  What? Did you say sweetbreads are made from animal pancreas, and other glands?  Oh, well in that case, I have never feasted on sweetbreads.  I don’t know about you, but I’m not terribly fond of lamb thymus, never have been.  Maybe one day when I visit the Texas state fair, I’ll have one deep fried on a stick with powdered sugar.  Sweet!

Tom Yum.  No.  Don’t know this one.  I did once buy a 24 pack of Bud and a bag of Cheez Doodles at a Tom Thumb in Florida.  Yum!

Umiboshi.  What is that?

Venison.  Not the meat for me.

Wasabi Peas.  I don’t like my peas spicy.

Zucchini Flower.  I don’t eat venison, Tom Yum, sweetbreads or flowers.  I don’t.

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