BP has a new plan for plugging the oil fountains – dropping a load of junk down the riser. Junk – like tires and golf balls. I suggest BP hire a golfer – Tiger Woods maybe or Jack Nickolaus to recommend the optimal golf ball to drop – Titlelist, Nike, Callaway, Top Flite – you know it might make a difference. If Tiger can plug the leak with the proper ball, he could help to rehabilitate his image and that of BP. And those tires. Look, I have four Michelin Harmony tires I’d donate to the cause. And my daughter’s Honda Fit has a leaking Dunlop. Drop that down on the leak. Hey, a leak on a leak – might just work.
Look, BP is trying everything they can to cap that pipe, so why not just drop down a bunch of divers in those Jules Verne diving suits – have Bear Grylls lead the way; he’s a superhuman Brit with elite Special Forces training. If Bear and Tiger can’t save the day, there may be no hope until those relief wells are drilled.
Filed under: humor | Tagged: Bear Grylls, BP, oil spill disaster, Tiger, tires |
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